helpless

i've always had trouble when it came to asking for certain things or expressing myself. I'm so use to people asking me for help to the point where i'm just now learning how to. Right now i'm at the point where everything is pilling up,i just need a major break because there's nothing that i can really do right now...i don't want to talk about it because i'm so use to having the solution to everything, but the sad thing is i can answer everyone's problems except my own. There are plenty things that i try my best to understand by sitting back and observing the situation, but this time after i observed things i felt helpless...maybe there isn't anything i can really do...maybe i have to just let things take their position on it's own.

2 hours

sometimes there are things on your chest that you have trouble expressing or a build of anger that you can't explain. around the time were people wouldn't really understand where you're coming from or if you get so angry that you can't control the tears then maybe you need to step away from the situation and take a break from the stress that keeps coming your way.sometimes it's hard for me to realize when i'm being overloaded because i have this addiction of helping and worrying about others.what most don't understand is that my request is more simple than it seems.i'm not asking for an whole day or a whole weekend, but just 2 hours to spend with my father.is it so bad to not want to feel like a stranger to your own parent? i'm not sure, but maybe my mind will clear itself up after i get away...sometimes people make situations way bigger than they are & maybe people would consider me that person, but oh well maybe i am...maybe i'm not...it wouldn't matter to me as long as i got my 2 hours.

College is around the corner and i can't help, but to feel really nervous. It's like the 3 years in high school flew by and now this year i will be a senior. In realization i know that not all my friendships will last past high school and that's just life. But going to college is beyond the friendships, it's starting complete independence. It's about going to get an higher education and finding a career that is best suited for you. I'm not rushing my senior year because i got a lot of "lasts" ahead of me, but i am anxious to start that college life because i have a lot of "firsts" before me.